The European Hitchhiker's Train Guide to Finland

Events Conference
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(You think this title is nonsense? Well get ready, it's just the beginning.)

You’ve probably heard that the Plone Conference this year will happen in Finland. In Jyväskylä to be precise.

You do not know where Jyväskylä is. I do not know where Jyväskylä is. Actually, it is not even certain this place exists.

What I can say with certainty is that it's a long way off. And that’s true wherever you live (it’s a geographical oddity that no one has yet been able to explain).

So you are probably planning to reach Finland by plane, right?

Well my friend, that would be a total mistake.

There are much more eco-friendly ways to go to Finland.

The first solution that comes to mind is obviously: CYCLING!!!

I love cycling, everybody loves cycling. Nevertheless I took a close look at that matter, and surprisingly enough, going to Jyväskylä by bike is actually pretty challenging.

For one, cycling in the snow is not easy. And more importantly, you can be attacked by an elk. Elks are perfectly peaceful animals, except when it comes to cyclists, because as all the living beings in Finland, elks are weird.

So, for these sad reasons, cycling is not an option to go to the Plone conference this year.

Then what? Train, of course.

That’s my plan.

Ok, so you might think “Eric, you’re nuts, going by train to Finland will be terribly long.” Fake!

It’s not long, if you live somewhere in Europe, it is probably about 2-3 days (oh, and here I mean “2 or 3 days”, not 23 days, like insisting “2” “3” “days”, no, totally not, not 23 days, just 2 or 3 days, is it amazing?).

So no, 2 or 3 days is not long, particularly if you consider it will produce 15 times less CO2 than going by plane, but still, let’s be totally transparent here, I forecast that it may be, from time to time, a bit… boring.

And that’s where I need you. I need friends, like, you know, travel companions, people you can chat with, bitch about WordPress, have a beer, debug a ZODB conflict, and a lot of other fun things to do when you're contemplating the endless sweep of the German countryside for hours on end.

So here is the deal: let’s go to Jyväskylä by train, let’s have fun on the way to the conference, let’s have fun at the conference, and let’s have fun on the way back! (yes, 2 or 3 more days too, but who wouldn't want more fun, right?!!!!)

My current plan is: Toulouse-Lille-Hambourg-Stockholm-Turku-Jyväskylä

It involves some stops in exotic cities and even a journey in a boat between Sweden and Finland.

But that’s just a draft, I am also exploring a path via the Baltic countries (which makes the boat trip shorter), and I will definitely ask a travel agency because long train trips are not easy to plan (and, no, the Internet is not helping a lot in this regard).

You are welcome to join me somewhere on my route, or… you are also totally free to not join me at all (because you do not like my french accent or because you think you might get into trouble if you travel with a weirdo like me) and still go by train on your own.

Let me know if you’re interested.

I will assemble all the details, all the hotel bookings and so on and publish it somewhere at some point. I’ll keep you posted!

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It is a continuation of the strong tradition of Plone Training before the conference. (You can have a Plone Sprint on the way home, if you are running late for the train.)

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This has made me rethink my travel plans. I don't have an amphibious bicycle to make it across the Cascades and Rockies, then the Atlantic. I'll have to take a plane to get to Europe.

Amsterdam is the easiest transit hub in Europe for me to reach. Hamburg generally requires an extra flight leg, whereas Munich and Berlin generally have fewer legs for me.

It looks like there are two general train and ferry routes from Hamburg to Jyväskylä: the Nordic via Sweden, and the Baltic via Poland and the Baltic countries.

Using Google Maps, I picked an arrival on a Sunday afternoon to illustrate a few possibilities. When I tried going more than two months out, the routes became fewer and eventually reached zero. It appears that many transit agencies don't publish routes beyond two months.

I'd be more flexible on the return trip. I had thought to fly out on Monday after the sprint, but I think it would be more fun to travel by train with friends, then continue my travels in the Netherlands. :locomotive:

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I am totally in for a no-fly travel. Since there is a OEBB NightJet train starting in Innsbruck and ending in Hamburg this would be my option to join if its not the Baltic route.

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Fantastic idea @ebrehault! And once you get there (if the place is indeed real), check out more cycling opportunities around the city: The best cycling routes in the Jyväskylä Region – Visit Jyväskylä Region

PS. If you appear to the conference party wearing cycling pants, you will get an extra free beer.

PPS. Train is a valid option too. If you travel through the Baltics, you will get cheap beer along the way.

PPPS. Elks are weird, that is true. But not as weird as reindeer - some say they can fly, especially on Christmas eve.

PPPPS. About flying, everyone please just come to the conference in a way that suits you. We won't judge. Even if you fly in the more traditional, non-reindeer style.

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I am a bit confused, I am not totally sure you meant "an extra free beer", or if it was just a typo and you meant "an extra free deer"… (both options are actually appealing though).

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Maybe both! Free as a beer for sure, but (rein)deer might be on the menu in some format too :+1:

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Yes but free as in deer?

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This is all indeered confusing, elks.

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